I avoid comedy competitions like they’re the Dave Matthews Band. A long time ago, I was in one. Actually, two. No, this isn’t the beginning of a bitter rant by another self-proclaimed hard-done-by comic who “got the shaft” in a competition he lost.
I won. Technically.
It was after the competition that I was approached by one of the judges who anointed me. In an ill-advised moment of candid disclosure, he told me that the judges had already made up their minds who the winner was before the competition began.
“Sure, once … There’s more of this shit. Click here.
There are a lot of aspects to comedy that are hidden to the public eye. Chief among them is the subtle dance between comic and booking agency.
For the uninformed: in comedy, “agency” means different things at different levels. At the level of the “development deal” comedian, who is on the cusp of breaking out with a movie or television show, or at any level above, an agent works in the conventional way. That is, they work to make their client the maximum amount of money in order to reap the maximum percentage.
However, for … There’s more of this shit. Click here.
I throw in the towel on trying to make a point with my jokes, and “give them what they want”, when I should give them what they need: A swift kick in the frontal lobe. But I don’t kick them in the lobe. I baste their brains with butter and honey, and see them safely back to sleep. It shames me. There’s more of this shit. Click here.
Flipping open the phone, not even bothering to pretend I’m taking to anyone, I stand approximately 4 inches from her ear, and say at the top of my considerable lungs, “Yeah, Paul, I told them not to put it there! Right! Leave it where it was!” There’s more of this shit. Click here.
…there was a kid who creepily reminded me of my wife’s ex – on a lot of uppers. He does not lack for enthusiasm, and punctuates every sentence with some variant of “fuck”. Not that I care, but it’s almost dizzying how many times in five short minutes the kid can drop the bomb. He’s not going to get real work any time soon. Not until at least he takes a couple Xanax and says “Smurf” instead. There’s more of this shit. Click here.